Mother's Day

Always meant to blog about Neel and Mili(aka Rahul and Anindita). Where do I begin? May 11th 2008 - Sunday, Mother's day :) Every year on Mother's day when I hear my co-workers and friends and mom everywhere talking about the gifts that they received or how they celebrated, there is only one thought in my mind. The best gift any mom could get is what I got on that Mother's day in 2008 - that I was going to be a mom. It was a couple of weeks more before I found out that I was going to be a mom of two. The excitement about being pregnant was just beginning and Somnath was still travelling. I had already become local and working at MSFT. We had decided to share the good news with others only after completing my first trimester. June 5th, 2008 - lunch in a cafeteria in another building with two teammates. Everything going well until I felt a big gush. First thought - what was that? Does not feel right - horror, uncertainity about what to do, flurry of emotions. Given that one of the teammates was a single guy, I really did not say anything. Somehow made it through lunch and on the walk back told them to go ahead and trailed behind to call Somnath. He asked me to walk back slowly to the office, to not panic and to call the doc. I did what he said - was in autopilot. What surprised me was that I was trying to shield myself from any bad news by not thinking about anything. Just kept telling myself - everything is fine - over and over again. Could I drive by myself? - asked the nurse. Could I or should I? Pinged my friend Savita on IM and told her my predicament. She said - sit still, I'm coming. She took me to the Bellevue clinic, the closest branch of my hospital where they took me in for an ultrasound. They checked the heartbeat of my baby - everything good...now let us see why you are bleeding, they said. The probe moved and then suddenly an exclamation - oh look...another heartbeat. Guess what - you are having twins!! My reaction - wow! Then they found the clot and told me that I should just get home and put up my feet. Semi bedrest. Called Somnath on the drive back and told him the doc says the "babies" are fine. He said "good good". I said..did you hear me? I said "babies" and there was a pause and he said "really? cool :)" I could hear the smile in his voice. Savita dropped me home and later that night Somnath flew in. Unfortunately, the night and next morning, my discomfort increased and so did the bleeding. We were asked to go to the Seattle hospital and Savi recommended I try acupuncture. They had an acupuncturist on duty at the hospital and I made an appointment to see her after my doc appt. The doc on duty walked in and said bluntly - you are most likely going to have a miscarriage. Who makes these guys doctors? That was the first thing that came to my mind - do we need emotionless, heartless people who almost in an automated voice give us their expert opinion? Understood that they do not want to be held liable about giving false hopes but hope isnt that something basic that every human being needs to survive? I did not know what to say until she said something else that completely ticked me off and I gave her a suitable retort. That is when she stopped(she had considered her duty done and was walking out already) and there was a remarkable change in her demeanour. She toned down her words and explained the situation in a more humane way. Though the news was 60% against and 40% in our favor, I held on to that 40% chance that my babies would be ok. Went in for the acupuncture session and went home and slept a solid 8 hrs. Maybe that session helped, or maybe my body held on or maybe my babies held on..or maybe it was the Mritunjaya mantra that mom gave me that helped - never a pious person, I did what she told me to..just kept chanting it...whatever it was that helped...my bleeding stopped the next day. I received extra attention for the next 3 months from my super specialist doctor - the one whom I trusted fully before he handed me over to my OBGYN. I am handing you back into good hands - that is what he told me and I trusted him. I asked him, will I see you again and he said..sure why not? We did see him later - on Neel and Mili's first birthday. How could we forget a doc who had given them their lives? Whenever I would have doubts about my pregnancy, Somnath would say "uske baal dekhe ho naa? Aise hi safed nahi huay". I held on to those words everytime I was in doubt - Thank God he had gray hair :)